


You Always Wonder

by mega_seeds



Category: Rick and Morty
Genre: Alcohol, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Bird Dick, Drug Use, M/M, Recreational Drug Use, Semi-Public Sex, The Flesh Curtains
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-16
Updated: 2017-06-16
Packaged: 2018-11-14 21:25:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11216565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mega_seeds/pseuds/mega_seeds
Summary: An unplanned drunken hook-up between two band-members; one is impulsive, the other prone to overthinking. Flesh Curtains era.





	You Always Wonder

Deep in concentration, Rick sat backstage, tuning his bass guitar, seated on the ground with his back up against a disconnected, most likely broken, amp. Spitting out the pick he had been holding between his front teeth and playing a few bass chords with it, he swore loudly and colourfully at the sounds this produced. He glanced up at his best friend with an over-dramatic pleading expression plastered across his features.

“Pers, you’ve g- URRP! – you’ve gotta tell Squanchy to – to stop using m-my guitar strings as f-fucking dental floss or whatever gross shit he gets up to in his f-free time, man.”

Stoic as ever, Birdperson remained stock-still, glancing down at the bassist without the slightest change in facial expression.

“With all due respect, Rick, that is not within my responsibilities.”

Rick sighed loudly, throwing his head back onto his shoulders in exaggerated desperation.

“Come ooon! You know he doesn’t f-fucking listen to – to – to anyone. ‘Cept you.”

He picked at the strings again, producing an uncomfortable dissonance which he allowed to hang in the air for effect. Birdperson kept a straight face, not indicating whether the sound displeased him or not. Rick wasn’t finished ranting.

“This shit isn’t g- URRP! – it’s n-not gonna win m-me any groupies, is it?!”

In response, Birdperson gave a light shrug, turning to stare at the rather grimy floor.

“Why would you require groupies when you have… us?”

He blinked a few times, struggling to compute what the unfamiliar feeling in his chest was, but decided to push it aside. Rick jumped to his feet, grinning broadly.

“N-no hard feelings, Pers! You know m-me…” He turned, giving Birdperson a little wink over his shoulder. “I’ve got an  _ insatiable _ appetite.”

The feathered man swallowed, not wanting to betray the small flutter in his stomach that wink had caused through any change in his facial expression.

“I am certainly aware of this.”

“How ‘bout you, hm, Pers?” Rick asked nonchalantly, stretching out his lanky body with his hands clasped above his head and showing off about three inches of his stomach in the process. “How’s the – URRP! – the m-mating season coming along, m-man?”

Birdperson found his eyes drawn to the exposed skin, silently cursing the blue-haired man’s affinity for crop-tops and other such revealing items of clothing. He could just about make out a small trail of hair leading downwards and disappearing under Rick’s obnoxious skull-shaped belt. His eyes wandered up to his friend’s face once again, somehow managing to keep a straight face as usual.

“I do not wish to discuss this with you.”

“Oh.” Rick dropped his hands to his side abruptly, now actually looking at the other properly for the first time since the start of their conversation. He felt slightly affronted by his words, but he wasn’t about to let that ruin his evening. “Sounds like you’re in n-need of a  _ real _ n-night out!”

“My apologies, Rick. I do not think that I…”

“N-nonsense, Pers!” The bassist interrupted him, draping a skinny arm comfortably around Birdperson’s shoulders. “We’ll go to – to Georgio’s, bring Squanchy, Gearhead, the – the whole gang! This tour’s been too f-fucking  _ busy _ if you ask m-me.”

The other grimaced, his shoulders slumping in defeat. He had never been any good at saying no to Rick.

 

A few hours later they found themselves in a crowded bar off-planet, a bar the three of them had frequented during their college days. The transparent gelatinous mass behind the bar, known to everyone as ‘Georgio’ even though it never spoke or indicated that it even possessed the ability to do so, knew to keep the drinks coming, and that Rick always liked an extra shot of vodka in his cream soda. It was later than they should have allowed it to get, considering they had rehearsals scheduled for the following day, but Squanchy had persuaded a variety of aliens to buy round after round of shots and was now loudly howling off-key karaoke on Georgio’s ramshackle little stage.

“Look at that – that li’l shit, Pers. Tell m-me he doesn’t wanna usurp you as – URRP! – as lead singer.”

Rick was laughing loudly at his own humour – after all, who else could you count on to laugh at your jokes if not yourself? – and leaning against the bar lazily while he swirled the contents of his glass around, his gaze scanning the room.

“I cannot say that I am worried.” Birdperson replied, deadpan as usual.

Out of nowhere Rick glanced over at him and mimed exaggerated shock, even putting a hand on his head and running it through his already tangled mop of blue hair.

“Your - your  _ drink’s _ empty, Pers!” He exclaimed reproachfully, grabbing for the glass.

Birdperson moved it out of the way, causing the bassist’s hand to clutch at empty air, almost losing his balance. He really was drunk.

“I have had enough, Rick.” He said, sounding rather more sober than he truly was. “I do not wish to suffer a hangover during rehearsals tomorrow.”

Rolling his eyes in response, Rick grabbed hold of his friend’s wrist instead, forcing his hand upwards so he could peer into the glass he was holding, bringing his face up unnecessarily close.

“Thought so!” He declared triumphantly. “That’s defin-URRP!-ately empty.”

He turned and rapped on the wooden top of the bar with his knuckles, causing Georgio to move over to them and place two shot glasses beside them.

“This guy – yeah, Pers, look at – look at this! – this guy gets it. Yeah.” Rick’s words were becoming slurred as he steadied himself against the bar so he could watch the gelatinous bartender fill the two glasses with a dark, amber liquid.

Once again, Birdperson found himself sighing resignedly as he took the shot glass and made to knock it back. Before he could do so, Rick raised a single finger.

“Nuh-uh, wait f-for – wait for m-me…”

He raised his own glass and hooked his arm around the feathered man’s, giving him a conspiratorial grin right before they both downed their drinks simultaneously. Rick could feel the searing liquid trickle down his throat. There really was nothing quite like it; he could feel his whole body buzzing.

Squanchy’s howling ringing in his ears, he stepped into the dancing crowd, pulling Bird Person along by the arm whether he wanted to or not. In no time at all, Rick’s body was taken over by the music. He was swaying his hips, lifting one foot then the other, a somewhat dazed grin on his face. He didn’t care if he looked stupid, something that Birdperson had always been jealous of. Every member of his species was concerned with looking respectable, even intimidating, at all times. Sometimes he wished he could simply turn that off – just let loose, like Rick did. He watched him as he himself only slowly shifted his weight in time with the droning bassline, eventually deciding he had had enough and pushing his way through the crowd to lean against the wall in a more dimly-lit corner of the room.

This was how it always went: Squanchy and Rick would party until the suns came up and it was Birdperson’s responsibility to make sure they got back to whatever hotel they were currently staying at in one piece. More often than not this was quite a difficult task, what with Rick’s various flings and Squanchy’s penchant for picking fights with far larger opponents once he became almost too intoxicated to walk. The feathered man sighed as he watched Rick dance with a green-skinned alien whose luscious blonde locks reached all the way to the floor, somehow managing not to get tangled despite her erratic dance moves. As she turned and began grinding against him, eyes half-lidded and seductive, he averted his gaze. Suddenly he felt as though there was something stuck in his throat.

It was almost an hour by the time Rick resurfaced. A hazy grin plastered across his features he stumbled towards Birdperson from the direction of the toilets, the green-skinned alien emerging moments later, adjusting her dress. Without any implication of what kind of sleazy encounter had just taken place in the bathroom, Rick threw an arm around his friend’s shoulders.

“W-whazzup, Pers? You – you havin’ f-fun, hm?”

Birdperson stared at him for several long moments, trying to keep his cool. Where the physical contact had put him at ease hours earlier, during their conversation backstage, it now caused his shoulders to tense up noticeably. It must have been glaringly obvious because Rick was able to pick up on it, even in his intoxicated state.

“What’s the m-matter, Pers?” He questioned, leaning in close.

The biting stench of alcohol lay on his breath, mingled with something else that Birdperson’s eager senses instantly detected.

“You haven’t consumed any illicit substances, have you, Rick?”

In response, Rick rolled his eyes and gave a long, drawn-out sigh. This was just like Birdperson, always trying to rain on his parade when he was having the most fun. And to think they’d known each other for such a long time.

“It was – it was Sheela! Lovely girl by the w-way. At least I  _ think _ she’s a – a – a girl. You – you should m-meet her, Pers. M-maybe she’d help you break that – that dry spell o’ yours.” He smirked, knowing exactly what would get under his friend’s skin.

Birdperson’s eyelid twitched involuntarily before he spoke.

“It was Crystal Kalaxian again, wasn’t it? I can see by your eyes.” He stated, referring to the pronounced blue tint staining the whites of Rick’s eyes.

“W-well aren’t  _ you _ quite the – the detective, Pers.”

Rick’s face wore a sneer as he narrowed his eyes at the other, his arm still draped around his shoulders. He was leaning against him bodily, with no regard for how much weight he was putting on Birdperson, who was pointedly staring at his left ear instead of meeting his drug-addled gaze.

“You are intoxicated, Rick. I am going to take you home.”

“Oh, you’d – you’d like that, w-wouldn’t you?” Rick purred, his voice suddenly far lower in pitch.

“N-no, I – I – uh…”

All of a sudden, the feathered man found himself stammering – something he never did – completely thrown by his friend’s unexpected change of tone. The way he was looking at him was almost seductive, his eyes heavy-lidded and drifting down to Birdperson’s lips. 

“Don’t – URRP! – don’t d-deny it, baby.” He slurred, moving closer still.

At this point, Birdperson didn’t know what to do. His eyes were darting from one side to the other, desperately searching for a way out, but Rick didn’t pay any attention to these obvious signals. Part of him had always been curious what kissing his best friend would be like and, having neither self-control nor presence of mind in his current state, he could see nothing wrong with doing so.

In the dim half-light, with blaring, bass-heavy music reverberating through his body, Rick leaned in and kissed him hungrily, sloppily, with no regard for what anyone might think. His hands moved upwards to tangle into his feathers and he pressed his scantily-clad body against Birdperson’s own, which remained rigid as a wooden plank. Nevertheless, his lips parted for the other’s insistent tongue, a small sigh involuntarily escaping him.

“I knew it.” Rick grinned smugly against the other’s lips, beyond triumphant that his hunch had been right.

The repercussions this might have didn’t concern him in the slightest. The bird man’s mind, on the other hand, was reeling. He didn’t know what to think or feel. In theory, he knew exactly that this was nothing but a drunken stunt to his friend, but that didn’t change how he felt. Each of Rick’s touches, no matter how clumsy the alcohol made them, felt electric to him. He was trying to resist it, to keep the heat building inside him from overwhelming him completely, but he felt himself teetering dangerously on the edge.

It took no more than for Rick to reach up and wrap both arms around his neck, deepening their kiss, for the stoic man’s resolve to crumble into nothing. His arms snaked around the other’s slim waist, pulling him closer still. He could feel every bit of him, hyperaware to Rick’s movements, which were in time to the music, all but grinding up against his body. The bassist broke their kiss only for a moment flash his best friend a cheeky grin, showing off all his teeth, which practically glowed beneath the bar’s unnatural lighting. Birdperson could make out the blue tinge which still lingered in the whites of his eyes, but at this point he was too far gone to pay this any mind.

“I want you.” He managed, shakily.

His words almost got stuck in his throat, he was so hoarse, but the response he received was worth it ten times over. For once, he got to see a flash of surprise cross Rick’s features, before he was in control once again. Sure, his stomach was fluttering, but that could be due to the drugs as well as the copious amounts of alcohol he had ingested. The lankier man kept his arms wrapped around Birdperson’s shoulders, but when he moved in, instead of reinitiating the kiss, his lips found his neck instead. Rick nuzzled into it, enjoying his friend’s almost overpowering scent – a familiar smell which had now taken on an entirely new, almost intoxicating flavour.

“Oh y-yeah?” He purred, his breathy words tickling Birdperson’s sensitive feathers. “You – you want m-more, hm?”

Swallowing his pride, he nodded meekly, eyes darting around the crowded dancefloor to make sure no one was paying them any mind. Rick had no such qualms; he had done this sort of thing many times before, and though this was certainly different in a way, he would most likely remember no more of it than he would a regular old fling.

With a smirk twitching around the corners of his mouth, he tugged his friend further from the mass of dancing partygoers and into one of Georgio’s few booths, which contained a rickety table and worn red leather seats. They were really rather too cramped for what he had in mind, but Rick was a resourceful man; he had made do with far less. Birdperson practically stumbled over his own feet, while Rick, who was quite clearly the drunker of the two managed to slink onto the upholstered bench with cat-like grace. He turned, one skinny leg dangling down under the table, and gave his friend the haziest grin he had ever seen. At this point Birdperson knew that he was far too drunk for this, but when the blue-haired man’s eager fingers curled themselves into the feathers adorning his chest and tugged him bodily down on top of him, he was too weak in the knees to put up even the semblance of resistance.

“Are you certain this is a good idea, Rick?” was all he managed, but the other blatantly ignored his half-hearted protest, not even dignifying it with a response.

Instead he pulled him closer, wanting nothing more than to feel the full weight of the muscular man on top of him, pressing him down into the cheap leather upholstery. Birdperson’s musk was overwhelming him now, rising to his head along with the alcohol. He buried his face in the crook of his neck, savouring it as he began to kiss along his jawline, then all the way down to his clavicle. The little shudders his friend gave at each kiss were delicious to him, even though the intimate gesture felt strangely out of place in this setting.

Wishing to remedy this, Rick reached down and began to undo his own belt, drunkenly clumsy fingers fumbling with the skull-shaped buckle for a few tedious moments. He couldn’t help but notice Birdperson already undoing his own, a deep flush settling in his cheeks as he took notice of his own embarrassing eagerness. Rick all but cackled, but soon bit his lip as he watched the other free his already stiffened member from the confines of his pants.

“S’that all f-for meee?” He slurred, his eyes becoming heavy-lidded.

Once again, Birdperson found himself unable to speak, simply nodding dumbfounded in response. He stroked himself a few times before Rick’s thin-fingered hands reached out and wrapped themselves around his impressive length. His movements were janky, unrefined despite his considerable experience, something that Birdperson decided to assign to how incredibly wasted he was. Besides, every clumsy touch sent something akin to an electric shock up his spine; he didn’t know if he could have handled much more.

“How’d you keep th- URRP! – that one hidden f-from us, huh, Pers?” Rick continued his drunken questioning, his eyes glued to the cock which practically twitched beneath his administering fingers.

“I wasn’t aware there was any interest on your part.” The feathered man responded truthfully, finding his voice but noting how much his own pitch had lowered due to arousal, becoming huskier despite its usual monotonous intonation.

“Oh, I – I – I’ve always  _ w-wondered _ , Pers. You – you know how it – how it is. You – URRP! – you always  _ wonder _ , right?”

This confirmed Birdperson’s suspicions, but at this point there was little he could do to stop what had been set in motion, even if he had wanted to, which, quite frankly, as he gazed down at his best friend eagerly pumping his slim hands up and down his throbbing member, he didn’t. Rick felt similarly. Heat was pooling in his lower abdomen, so he eventually tore his hands away from the other’s cock to slip his black skinny jeans half-way down his legs, along with the tight underwear he wore underneath. He was about to begin stroking himself, when Birdperson’s large hand beat him to it, enveloping his length with its warmth. Rick was far more vocal in his pleasure, giving out an audible sigh and allowing his head to fall back onto the red leather seat of the booth. The larger male couldn’t help but marvel at how beautiful he looked, eyes fluttering close to shut, cheeks and nose tinted with a deep crimson flush, bright blue hair fanning out from his head like some sort of electric halo. He lost himself in the sight for a moment, but Rick managed to break the spell.

“I – I want you inside m-me, Pers. N-now.” He growled, one hand scrabbling at Birdperson’s chest like a needy child demanding a toy.

The words sent a shiver up his spine. It was almost as though they were back to their usual dynamic, with Rick spouting something outrageous just to get a rise – or any kind of reaction – out of his friend, never quite succeeding. Instead of the usual deadpan response, however, Birdperson positioned his tense cock, already slippery with precum, at the rockstar’s now exposed entrance. Rick visibly shivered, biting his lip in an almost calculatedly seductive manner as he fixed the other’s gaze with his own and nodded with purpose.

Wishing to be somewhat gentle, the feathered man entered him slowly, giving him time to adjust to the considerable width of his cock before really driving the length into him. Rick hissed through his teeth, evidently enjoying himself, which he took as encouragement to push further inside his almost unbearably tight hole. Overwhelming heat flooded him, all but causing him to lose his grip on the backrest against which he had been steadying himself. Almost unwillingly, he withdrew before plunging deeper, repeating his motion with more momentum this time and earning an ecstatic groan from Rick. The noise of the partying crowd faded into a distant background roar as their hoarse moans mingled in the heavy air with each thrust. The blue-haired man met each of his motions fervently, straining the muscles in his pert ass as though his life depended on it.

Rick felt more intoxicated now than the massive amounts of booze and the Kalaxian high put together had been able to achieve. This was exactly how he liked it: quick and dirty, right there and then, when the urge got to him. He found himself clinging onto Birdperson’s bulky frame, black-polished nails digging into his flesh as he sought for purchase. After a few more thrusts he managed to hitch up his legs and hook them behind the other’s back, allowing him to plunge even deeper. He could tell his friend was coming apart by the noises he was making, unlike anything Rick had ever heard from him, even during their wildest, most guttural performances on stage. It was as though some unfamiliar, far more animalistic part of him was taking over, and it sent delicious shivers up and down his spine.

Birdperson’s next thrust hit that spot deep inside which caused him to see stars. All of a sudden Rick found himself writhing beneath the larger man, his back arching uncontrollably as his head was thrown back to let out a long, drawn out moan. The hand clamped around his cock only needed one more stroke before he spent himself, gasping for air as his cum painted a haphazard pattern on both their heaving stomachs. The sensation of Rick’s muscles clenching around his length sent Birdperson over the edge moments later. His violent climax left him clinging to his friend’s lanky frame, face pressed tightly against the sweat-slick skin of his exposed chest until the tension finally left his body.

He slumped down on top of the other, completely numb to his surroundings for several long moments. By the time he came to his senses, Rick was already shifting beneath him uneasily.

“C’mon, Pers. If – if Squanchy sees us like this well n-never hear the – URRP! – the end of it.” He muttered, tucking away his softening member with clumsy movements as he spoke.

In response, Birdperson simply groaned. He didn’t want the moment to end this soon – or at all, for that matter – but he knew his friend had a point. If someone saw them it could certainly lead to some severe consequences he didn’t particularly want to deal with. Nevertheless he found himself savouring the warmth of that lean, almost bony body against his own up until the very moment Rick wriggled out of his grasp and sat up unsteadily on the thinly upholstered bench. He slicked back his mussed hair with one hand, the other wiping a few specks of cum off his already somewhat grimy crop top.

“You are correct as always, Rick.” Birdperson managed to mutter as he sat up alongside him, attempting to get some of the cum out of his feathers with little success and groaning.

A shower was in order. Suddenly all he felt like doing was returning to his hotel room and curling up beneath the covers. He didn’t know what had gotten into him, but the high of climax had faded into a rather stale aftertaste. Seeing Rick clamber off the bench and sit atop the table with a triumphant, satisfied smirk wasn’t exactly helping. The bassist looked on top of the world, dangling his feet over the edge as his gaze lingered on his friend. He wondered what thoughts lay behind Birdperson’s typically neutral expression; it was a mystery to him. In that moment, Rick felt unusually at ease and wanted nothing more than to knock back a few more beers and collapse in a happy daze until the inevitable hangover kicked the shit out of him the following day. He didn’t even feel like returning to the dance floor, even though another of his favourite songs had come on and Squanchy had seemingly relinquished his iron grip on the karaoke mic to a more talented singer. In what he considered a graceful, fluid motion but what was probably closer to a drunken stumble, Rick jumped off the table, bracing himself against his friend who now stood stoically beside their booth, eyes fixed on the ground.

If not for the conspicuous stains on both their clothing, an innocent bystander wouldn’t have been able to tell what had just transpired between them. Moments later Rick had spun around to face the marginally taller male.

“Wanna get outta here?” He slurred.

Birdperson swallowed heavily. He wasn’t sure the implications he was reading into this were truly there – he had never been particularly proficient at reading between the lines of human speech, which contained far more nuances and subtleties than his people’s native language – but he knew Rick well enough to know he might just be right.


End file.
